Someone is watching you. He is three and a half feet tall, has grass stains on his jeans and answers to the name “Squirt.”
Our children are born into the world looking like us. Then they start talking like us and acting like us. Is it important to consider how we talk and act? Definitely. Your kids are watching you and taking it all in. You are their example of how to act in this world.
So, I am going to provide you with some things your children need to hear you say.
1. “I love you.”
This sometimes seems to be easier for mom than it is for dad, especially as the kids get older but this is THE most important thing you can say to your kids. You need to say it consistently every day. Your kids need to hear this to know they are loved! It makes them feel the safety and security that we all desire to provide for our children.
Your kids need to hear you praying. Whether at the dinner table or quietly during your quiet time with your Bible, they need to know you have a relationship with the Lord. Whether your kids are born-again believers yet or not, they need to know that you are.
3. “I’m sorry.”
We often demand that our kids apologize to us or other when they have done something wrong. We need to also set the example and apologize to them when we do them wrong. We are not perfect and our kids need to know that we know we are not perfect and sometime make mistakes. Apologizing communicates humility which is a character quality we want our own children to have.
4. “You’re really good at…”
We all like to be affirmed in our talents. Let you kids know what they are good at, even if they aren’t really that good at it yet. Encourage them in something they love, whether it’s baseball, playing the piano, acting or riding a unicycle!
5. “I missed you.”
Let your kids know you like it when they are around. They will know this when you tell them that you missed them. After you get back from a trip or they get back from spending the night at a friends house, tell them you missed them. Again…even if you didn’t because you really needed the break! They will feel loved and safe and will be happy to be home.
6. “You’re funny.”
I don’t really do as well as I should with this one. I got this from somewhere else and I can’t remember where or I would credit them. But kids like to be funny and like to think they are funny. But kids don’t always tell the funniest jokes or stories though they sometimes try. But sometimes, try to remember to tell them they are funny after they’ve told you a joke. Communicate the appreciation you have of them. Let them know in this way that you like to have them around.
7. “You’re a great kid.”
Sometimes kids disobey and we need to discipline them. But sometimes they do obey. And sometimes they even obey without even being asked. Be observant enough to know when this happens. Pay attention and let them know you appreciate it. We all want to be better than “good”. We want to be great! Tell your kids they are.
You want a bonus? If you said “yes” then read on!
8. “I’m glad your my son/daughter.”
There is a lot of competition among peers. Sometimes kids think they aren’t good enough because other kids put them down so much. Let your kids know you are glad they are your child. This might be about as important as telling them “I love you.” Sometimes kids wish they were like someone else who is more talented or popular. But you need to let them know you like them just the way they are and wouldn’t want any other kid to be their son.
Maybe you already say these things but maybe there are some that you don’t say or don’t say enough. Start now. Start tonight. Continue to build your relationship with them. You can do it! I know you can. Because you’re a great parent.
Lead your children on!